Cameron Diaz has been married to Benji Madden for eight years, and she has some thoughts about what she thinks can help build a happy marriage. The mom of one recently said that she thinks we need to “normalize separate beds” for married couples, even going so far as to say that some people might need separate homes. And she’s certainly making a solid case for this idea.
Diaz was a guest on Molly Sims’ podcast Lipstick on the Rim along with her Avaline business partner Katherine Power, where the two friends discussed their wine company as well as some health and beauty tips. After Sims discussed her husband’s loud snoring with her co-host Emese Gorley, Diaz piped up with a solution.
“We should normalize separate bedrooms,” Diaz, who shares 4-year-old daughter Raddix with Madden, said before taking it one step further. “I would literally, like, I have my house, you have yours, we have the family house in the middle. I will go and sleep in my room, you go sleep in your room. I’m fine.”
The Charlie’s Angels star put so much thought into the idea, she even thought about what to do about sexy time. “And we have the bedroom in the middle that we can convene in for our, you know, relations.”
Now just because Diaz supports the idea of having separate bedrooms doesn’t mean that’s how she and her husband handle their sleeping arrangements. She came up with the idea before she got married. “By the way, I don’t feel that way now because my husband is so wonderful,” she told Sims. “I said that before I got married.”
Diaz might be on to something here, according to sleep specialist Wendy Troxel, who told CNN that many couples are turning to “sleep divorce,” the practice of sleeping in separate bedrooms, to help improve the quality of their rest. “The question I always get is, ‘Is it bad if my partner and I sleep apart?’ The answer is no, not necessarily,” Troxel told the news outlet. “It can even have some significant upsides.” She went on to say that couples who slept in separate bedrooms could make them less resentful, happier, and able to enjoy the time they do spend in bed together more easily.
Certainly plenty of people were reacting to the idea on social media. “I’ve been married 30 years this June. We haven’t slept in the same room for the last 25 years unless we are in vacation. It’s just easier. She likes noise and cold I like warm and silent,” wrote one husband on X, formerly Twitter.
“Why do i kinda agree.. i like to spread out and not be hot all night we can do what we do then go to bed in separate beds,” added another.
While some people seemed to worry about the idea, with one noting, “What’s marriage if you both sleep in different rooms,” there were plenty of people who thought personal space could be healthy for a marriage. “Y'all can still sleep in the same bed if you guys want, But normalize having each others own separate, designated spaces. that's the move,” one person wrote.
Personal space within a marriage does feel like a good idea. And picking out your own bedding and designing your own space and such? That sounds kind of great.
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